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    Anything Writing, Critic

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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Wed Jan 29, 2014 11:31 pm

    yaaa but i gotta think of how im gonna do the next part, i dont think i mgonna start typing it tonight cuz i was gonna do something else


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Legolas on Wed Jan 29, 2014 11:39 pm

    thats fine u don't have to cuz you did this today already ^^


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Wed Jan 29, 2014 11:56 pm

    i wanna write something but im not sure what


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Legolas on Thu Jan 30, 2014 12:02 am

    what about your story?


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Sun Feb 02, 2014 12:42 am

    WHAT I HAVE SO FAR 


    “So what’s your story?’
    Neer had asked me a million generic questions, nothing quite as personal as yesterdays list, mostly just stuff like ‘what hospital did you go to? What was it like?’ blah blah blah. 
    I could tell there was something up with Neer Cotter, he had a story, which I deserved to know.
    “Nothing, don’t have one.” He said quickly, to quickly.
    “Everyone has a story, Neer, look I told you about me so now it’s your turn.”
    “I said I don’t have one, I have to go, I’ll talk to you later.”
    “Neer-”
    “Seriously, I’ll see you later.” He stood up from his seat, I could see a little bit of fear in his hazel eyes but Is aid nothing else as he left.
    I sat there in the chair for a couple more minutes, thinking about the tone of Neer’s voice, the way he immediately put up the defensive, how he spoke sharply, how is shoulder hunched, how I could clearly see his hands shake from under the table. 
    My mother always said I was nosy.
    I left the restaurant and went back to my car, I didn’t even turn on the radio when I pulled out of the parking lot. 
    I made my way up to my apartment, feeling a heaviness on my shoulder. I hated it when people asked me about my issues so I could get where Neer was coming from, I felt awful.
    Once I got into my apartment, safe from the world and its many dangers, I fell onto my couch and stared up at my ceiling. My eyes closed and I let myself relax, breathing deeply in and out, in and out, in and out.
    Then I heard muffled yelling, singing, and music blaring from the apartment above me. 
    I groaned and glanced at my clock. 10:30.
    I hadn’t realized I was talking to Neer for 2 hours. 
    Something smashed upstairs and I sat up. Were Kendal and Strife seriously having a party? 
    Anger welled up inside me, anger to myself for making Neer feel bad, anger that those fuckers upstairs wouldn’t shut the hell up, anger that I wasn’t with them.
    I stood and sucked up whatever anxiety I had, shoving my boots back on and ripping open my door, I wanted to stop myself, but I just kept going.
    I marched up the stairs, part of my mind begged me to stop while the other part cheered me on. I arrived at Kendal and Strife’s door, clearly hearing the yelling and whooping that lay inside, my hand lifted itself and I knocked on the door. Twice. Hard. 
    The noise inside died down and I could clearly hear someone exclaim “Shit!”
    Once I heard the footsteps my brain finally got a hold of my body and told it this was a bad idea.
    Crap, shit, fuck, why did I do this, why why why why why why. There are people, people, in their. A person is going to answer, a person is going to look at me, these people are going to think I’m an idiot, I’m stupid, stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid. I need to go, run run run run run.
    My heals turned and I stoop a dazed step to the side, my stomach felt like it was imploding and dizziness hit my head like a freight train. I leaned my shoulder against the wall and put my hands on my knees.
    Holy shit I’m going to throw up.
    “Serena?” I looked up, Kendal was staring at me, she stood in the doorway, her straight hair in a messy bun and a red cup in her hand. 
    I opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out and I just blinked at her.
    “You look like you’re going to hurl, you should come in.”
    She came closer and I shook my head when her hands reached out to me. 
    “I’m okay.” I said slowly and Kendal cocked her head to the side, amber eyes blinking at me. “You should come in.” she demanded again.
    “I better be going.” I stood up normally, my feet felt like lead and the world spinned around me but I took a step forward before Kendal grabbed my wrist. 
    I hated, hated, when people touched me. 
    But I didn’t even get the chance to so anything, she yanked me inside and shut the door.
    I felt like I was in a nightmare.
    Five other people stood in the room, most of which I didn’t even know the names to, but they all knew me. 
    Strife stood at the kitchen counter with a short Egyptian girl with black hair that reached her jaw, she looked to be in her late teens, across the room a limber guy about the same age as the Egyptian girl stood with two other guys, he had dark brown hair that was in a pony tail and an eye patch over his left eye. 
    Alright.
    He was talking with a shorter red head, well not red but orange, pure orange hair. The ginger was pale and he slanted towards the eye patch dude but still looked towards me. Behind him stood a taller man, a little more tan then the red head, freckles dotted across his face and he had wild blond hair that fluffed up on the top.
    I recognized every single one of them, but did not know a single name. 
    The Egyptian girl lived with eyepatch guy AKA the ratty boyfriend, they had a habit of banging in every single place imaginable. The two other men where dyed hair and med student. I guess dyed hair can’t be dyed hair anymore since we wore in natural color but he and med student were a couple and lived together as well, they worked late. 


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Sun Feb 02, 2014 1:42 am

    “So what’s your story?’
    Neer had asked me a million generic questions, nothing quite as personal as yesterdays list, mostly just stuff like ‘what hospital did you go to? What was it like?’ blah blah blah. 
    I could tell there was something up with Neer Cotter, he had a story, which I deserved to know.
    “Nothing, don’t have one.” He said quickly, to quickly.
    “Everyone has a story, Neer, look I told you about me so now it’s your turn.”
    “I said I don’t have one, I have to go, I’ll talk to you later.”
    “Neer-”
    “Seriously, I’ll see you later.” He stood up from his seat, I could see a little bit of fear in his hazel eyes but Is aid nothing else as he left.
    I sat there in the chair for a couple more minutes, thinking about the tone of Neer’s voice, the way he immediately put up the defensive, how he spoke sharply, how is shoulder hunched, how I could clearly see his hands shake from under the table. 
    My mother always said I was nosy.
    I left the restaurant and went back to my car, I didn’t even turn on the radio when I pulled out of the parking lot. 
    I made my way up to my apartment, feeling a heaviness on my shoulder. I hated it when people asked me about my issues so I could get where Neer was coming from, I felt awful.
    Once I got into my apartment, safe from the world and its many dangers, I fell onto my couch and stared up at my ceiling. My eyes closed and I let myself relax, breathing deeply in and out, in and out, in and out.
    Then I heard muffled yelling, singing, and music blaring from the apartment above me. 
    I groaned and glanced at my clock. 10:30.
    I hadn’t realized I was talking to Neer for 2 hours. 
    Something smashed upstairs and I sat up. Were Kendal and Strife seriously having a party? 
    Anger welled up inside me, anger to myself for making Neer feel bad, anger that those fuckers upstairs wouldn’t shut the hell up, anger that I wasn’t with them.
    I stood and sucked up whatever anxiety I had, shoving my boots back on and ripping open my door, I wanted to stop myself, but I just kept going.
    I marched up the stairs, part of my mind begged me to stop while the other part cheered me on. I arrived at Kendal and Strife’s door, clearly hearing the yelling and whooping that lay inside, my hand lifted itself and I knocked on the door. Twice. Hard. 
    The noise inside died down and I could clearly hear someone exclaim “Shit!”
    Once I heard the footsteps my brain finally got a hold of my body and told it this was a bad idea.
    Crap, shit, fuck, why did I do this, why why why why why why. There are people, people, in their. A person is going to answer, a person is going to look at me, these people are going to think I’m an idiot, I’m stupid, stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid. I need to go, run run run run run.
    My heals turned and I stoop a dazed step to the side, my stomach felt like it was imploding and dizziness hit my head like a freight train. I leaned my shoulder against the wall and put my hands on my knees.
    Holy shit I’m going to throw up.
    “Serena?” I looked up, Kendal was staring at me, she stood in the doorway, her straight hair in a messy bun and a red cup in her hand. 
    I opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out and I just blinked at her.
    “You look like you’re going to hurl, you should come in.”
    She came closer and I shook my head when her hands reached out to me. 
    “I’m okay.” I said slowly and Kendal cocked her head to the side, amber eyes blinking at me. “You should come in.” she demanded again.
    “I better be going.” I stood up normally, my feet felt like lead and the world spinned around me but I took a step forward before Kendal grabbed my wrist. 
    I hated, hated, when people touched me. 
    But I didn’t even get the chance to so anything, she yanked me inside and shut the door.
    I felt like I was in a nightmare.
    Five other people stood in the room, most of which I didn’t even know the names to, but they all knew me. 
    Strife stood at the kitchen counter with a short Egyptian girl with black hair that reached her jaw, she looked to be in her late teens, across the room a limber guy about the same age as the Egyptian girl stood with two other guys, he had dark brown hair that was in a pony tail and an eye patch over his left eye. 
    Alright.
    He was talking with a shorter red head, well not red but orange, pure orange hair. The ginger was pale and he slanted towards the eye patch dude but still looked towards me. Behind him stood a taller man, a little more tan then the red head, freckles dotted across his face and he had wild blond hair that fluffed up on the top.
    I recognized every single one of them, but did not know a single name. 
    The Egyptian girl lived with eyepatch guy AKA the ratty boyfriend, they had a habit of banging in every single place imaginable. The two other men where dyed hair and med student. I guess dyed hair can’t be dyed hair anymore since we wore in natural color but he and med student were a couple and lived together as well, they worked late. 
    “Guys don’t be creepy.”  Kendal chimed in when no one said anything for, like, five minutes.
    “Hey Serena.” Med student smiled at me politely and waved.
    “Hi.” Shit I don’t know that kids name
    “Hey there.” Eye patch gave me the one over look and smirked, Egyptian girl threw ice at his head.
    “Ohhhkay.” I sighed and spoke very quickly. “Could you guys maybe keep it down, I’m trying to sleep, thanks.” 
    I turned on my heels and didn’t even come close to the door when Kendal stepped in front of me.
    “Of course Serena! Maybe some of us, could be a little more quiet then others.” She glared at Ginger.
    “Oi, tell that fucker not to touch my man and then this won’t happen!” He glared at eye patch. He had a British accent.
    “Fox-” Med student started.
    “No!” His boyfriend pointed at eye patch who just grinned “He’s got a girlfriend so he isn’t allowed to touch you!”
    “Hey man-”
    “Lay off my Tay before I push you into another lamp!”
    “Is that what broke?”
    Kendal walked past them to the kitchen while rolling her eyes. “Yup, so watch for broken glass shards, curtesy of Fox.” 
    So Fox was ginger, Tay was med student, though I doubt his name is Tay.
    “I wouldn’t blame Fox, maybe if Zeppelin didn’t hit on other people while he had a girlfriend, these things wouldn’t happen.” Egyptian girl walked over with a smirk on her face while Strife followed behind, putting an arm around Kendal’s waist and kissing her on the cheek.
    Zeppelin? Thats eye patch.
    “Sorry Nav, you know that you’re the hottest girl ever right?”
    Egyptian girl is Nav.
    Zeppelin turned around and grabbed Nav’s wrist, drawing her close and kissing her before she said another word. All at once everyone except me yelled “STOP!” and the two immediately broke away, smiling like idiots.
    “They do that way to much.” Kendal sighed and looked over at me while Strife just looked disgruntled. 
    “Anyway, thanks.” Again, for the millionth time, I turned around to leave.
    “Hey wait!” Kendal looked confused when I looked over at her “Don’t you wanna stay?” 
    “Yea so we can talk about Neer!” Fox yelled in.
    “Were not talking about Neer.”
    “You only don’t want to cause he’s you’re brother.”
    “You are absolutely right.”
    “Well I want to hear about Neer so-” Kendal motioned to the couches where the rest of her little gang started to go to. “sit.” 
    I complied and sat on a single chair while the rest sat around me.
    Fox and his boyfriend whom I still did not know the real name to sat to the right of me, ginger boy was literally sitting in his poor taller boyfriends lap. 
    Kendal and Strife sat on the other side, respectfully holding hands and not being annoying like the other two couples. I shouldn’t count ‘Tay’ though, he looked innocent.
    Zeppelin sat next to Fox who shoved him in the ribs so then he moved across to sit by Strife, who glared.
    Nav sat next to Fox and stuck her tongue out at Zeppelin when he pouted.
    “So.” Kendal clapped her hands together. “Tell us about Neer.”


    Last edited by Admin on Tue Feb 04, 2014 4:16 pm; edited 1 time in total


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Tue Feb 04, 2014 4:12 pm

    Actually it’s late, I’d rather just go.” 
    “No, you sat in the chair, you speak.” Nav had her hands on her knees and she looked at me intensely.
    “I don’t want to gossip.”
    Kendal spoke up “You’re not ‘gossiping’, you’re providing information about our odd little Neer.” 
    “Really? Little?”
    “Shut up Strife.”
    “I say we let Serena leave.”
    “Shut up Strife.” The group spoke in unison. 
    Kendal turned her gaze away from her boyfriend. “We already know how you two met, so lets just skip that-” 
    “How do you know that?”
    “He told me.” 
    “Just like how you told him-” I stopped myself feeling a pit of frustration in my stomach as a I thought back to my confrontation with Kendal. 
    “That you have anorexia.” She finished my sentence. 
    My neck felt like it might break, I whipped my head to stare at her, not sure what my emotions was: anger, betrayal, desperation?
    “It’s ok.” The Tay guy said gently, I felt my hands start to shake and a lump formed in my throat. 
    “Were not going to judge you, you should here about our pasts.” He laughed lightly and smiled at me. “It wasn’t nice or right to snoop into your personal business though, so we are sorry.” His gaze darted around to the group and they all nodded and repeated “Sorry.” 
    “It’s-it’s okay.” It’s not okay. “I just wished you didn’t” I just wish that you all would simultaneously die. 
    “Sorry Serena.” Kendal bit her lip and sighed. “Tao’s right, we shouldn’t have done that.” She glared at Fox.
    So Tay is Tao.
    “What!” Fox put his hands up in mock surrender. “I just looked her up, don’t get all mad at me, remember, Zeppelin broke Reggie!”
    “You pushed me into him!”
    “You harassed my boyfriend!”
    “He liked it!”
    “Um, no I didn’t.”
    “How dare you try to blame my poor innocent Tay Tay-”
    “Innocent? Ha! Tell that to the very noticeable and red hickies on your neck, Fox.”
    Fox grinned slyly and glanced at Tao, who was covering his blushing face.
    “Alright alright enough, can we please hear more about Neer now?” Kendal turned her attention back to me and didn’t even look surprised by Zeppelin’s comment, like it was a natural occurrence. 
    “Actually.” My voice sounded small. “Who is Reggie?”
    “It’s the lamp.” Strife said matter-of-factly.
    “That just rises more questions.”
    Naveah sighed and smacked Fox who was currently creeping his hand up Tao’s back. “All of the apartments come with the same lamp, like every single one, so we decided to name the lamp. It looked like a Reggie, so it became Reggie.” 
    “And then Zeppelin murdered Reggie #1.” Fox grumbled.
    “I did not!”
    “So!” Kendal, again, but in. “What do you think?”
    “Of what?”
    “Of Neer!”
    “Well what about him?”
    “Would you date him?”
    I nearly choked on air. 
    “What?!”
    “He seems to think highly of you.”
    “I don’t really care if he gives a shit about me because, frankly, I don’t give a shit about him. He’s some random dude I met and then talked to about my not so attractive past. That isn’t really a great first impression, plus he didn’t seem interested in me at all.”

    Strife was the first one to speak. “Oh he was interested all right.”
    “Huh?” 
    Kendal shoved her boyfriend in the ribs, then rolled her eyes at me. “Come on, Serena. He’s smitten with you.” Her voice rose higher as she giggled.
    “Can I go now?”
    “No! You need to tell us more about what Neer and you talked about.”
    “You know what we talked about, he was just doing an article on mental illness.”

    “He was just doing an article on you, you mean.”
    I felt a rush of heat in my cheeks. What did she mean? I thought Neer was doing an article on multiple people, not just me. 
    “What..what do you mean?”
    “I mean Neer decided to just focus on you.” 
    “I have to go.”
    “Serena, wait!”
    I felt the dizziness return and I had no idea why. I could hear voices as I stood up, footsteps and people stepping in front of me, was I over reacting? I have no idea.
    I got to the door, ever sound echoing in my ears, my vision blurred but I grabbed the door knob and yanked it open, stumbling outside into the hallway, voices still ringing inside my head, but not mine. 
    Someone grabbed my arm but my instincts kicked in from no where, my elbow snapped back hitting something soft and I heard a loud yelp and then I charged down the steps, leaping to skip three steps at a time. The dizziness started to fade and it’s like something awakened inside of me to show me what was happening, my ankle twisted and I heard a scream.
    I tumbled down the remaining steps, sharp pain sprung from the back of my skull and I closed my eyes tight until my body stopped moving. 
    “Are you okay?”


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Sun Feb 16, 2014 3:25 am

    “I’m still confused on how you fell down the stairs.”
    Neer was relentless, he followed me up the stairs when I shrugged off the incident like it was nothing, my head felt cleared, probably because my body was only focusing on the pain.
    A few minutes later I was sitting on my couch with Neer cotter on my coffee table in front of me, dabbing the bleeding cut with rubbing alcohol on a washcloth. I don’t know why I even agreed to let him help me, or how treating scrapes seemed like routine to him but it helped that I was allowed to complain about being dizzy as an excuse to not talk.
    My anxiety was under control now, the fall knocking some sense into my brain and making it start again.
    “I told you I tripped.”
    “Why do I feel like that isn’t the entire story?”
    “Well maybe I don’t need or want to tell you the entire story.”
    “Fine, you don’t have to.”
    “I wasn’t going to.”
    “Fine.”
    “Fine.”
    Neer looked a little annoyed as he kept pressing the cloth to my fore head “You don’t have to stay. I’m fine.”
    He looked up into my eyes, they seemed shocked and his breath hitched in his throat like it was offensive that I would ask him to leave. 
    “Oh...alright.” He stood up and shuffled around, picking up his supplies while staring at the ground, never looking directly into my eyes.
    “H-hey.” What. What are you doing? “Maybe we could grab a bite tomorrow?” I called to him as walked out the door
    He turned and looked a little lost. “Me?” 
    “Yes you.” I smiles. What is wrong with you? You barely know this guy!
    “Sure, yea definitely.”
    “Cool, thanks again.”
    “My pleasure.”
    “Goodnight.”
    “Night.”
    My door was shut and I sighed, walking to my bed room and flopped down on my  bed, laying on my side and contemplating what had driven me to ask out Neer Cotter?
    Well let’s review:
    You haven’t even known him for a week, he seems a little suspicious, you know he’s had some issues but for what, we don’t know. Everything about him screams sweet but also maybe unstable, he gets angry and annoyed pretty easily which reminds you of yourself, and he doesn’t look it, but you think he might be very intelligent, an observer.
    But why ask him out?
    I can get that he is cute, but I don’t date for cute, I don’t date period. He is smart and sweet and probably very interesting, but I don’t date.
    So why?
    Could it be because your lonely? Could it be because for the first time in forever someone actually cares about you, even if he doesn’t ‘care’ he showed interest. You thought he was doing it on many different people and he only wrote about you and maybe deep, deep down that made you feel special and it made you want to talk more. Maybe he has the most honest and un judging eyes you have ever seen. Maybe you just need someone.
    I got up and turned off my light after stripping down into my pajamas. I crawled into my bed and glared up at the ceiling.
    Fuck you brain, I don’t need anybody but myself. 


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Legolas on Sun Feb 16, 2014 3:47 am

    awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
    i kept thinking AWWW OH MY GOD at like every sentence in that last paragraph man was geettin the feelies
    and you made him seem all awkward and cute i love it oh and oh my gosh it was short yes but it was cute.


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Sun Feb 16, 2014 3:49 am

    yaaaaay
    my work is complete for that
    wooo go me getting people right and givin feelies

    thank you for the nice compliments friend


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Mon Feb 17, 2014 5:02 pm

    The place was crowded, dirty, smelly, and frankly a little bit on the boring side. Tao has been sitting on the same stool for a half an hour, waiting for Ms. Kendal Cloud to get herself down here. 
    You think she would treat her gay best friend better but to no avail he always seems to wined up on the short end of the stick. 
    I’m allowed to get drunk. Tao took another swig of his beer. I’m an adult. 
    Every once and a while a shitty day comes along at work, nurses spill blood on you, someone throws up on your shoes, some kid breaks expensive equipment because his dumb ass mom isn’t watching her toddler. And people die.
    Tao knows that, when he first thought of being a doctor he knew that. He knew all of these. 
    But it didn’t help when a bunch of crappy stuff happens right after a failed surgery.
    He doesn’t like to dwell on the mistakes, the deaths, the failures. If he did then he would probably be even more depressed then he already did, Tao wouldn’t be able to do his job, to help people, if he kept in the past. His mother always said that if he wanted to redeem his loses then he would have to work extra hard to save people.
    Tao believes she’s right but not when he was sitting at a bar, not when he held a drink in hand.
    It’s not like Tao has never gotten drunk before, he has, oh he has. His two roommates, Serena and Neer, always had alcohol in the apartment, Serena had a wine thing and Neer has a hard time relaxing, plus there are people always over, always group meet ups. The people who visited were Tao’s friends too, but still.
    His roomates had lives, they had fun, they had each other and their jobs and their friends.
    Tao didn’t. Tao isn’t happy, he isn’t living, he’s surviving, taking up space.
    He was so close to the dream job, so close to being what he always wanted to be. 
    But it wasn’t enough.
    He heard footsteps behind him and a shadow darkened the counter.
    “Hey there, love, I’m in charge of finding the hottest guy at the bar and you are that guy, I’m going to need your address so we can send you a small check in the mail.”
    Tao sighed and turned his head, expecting to see a sleazy older English gentlemen but instead was greeted with a very pleasant looking ginger man, around the same age as himself. He had light grey eyes and was smiling arrogantly, Tao glanced down at his body. The man wasn’t so much muscular as lean but he was still plenty fit and had a very tight fitting black waistcoat over a white dress shirt and red tie and black dress pants. He sat himself down on the stool next to Tao and grinned even more at the other man’s speechlessness. 
    “Hi and go fuck yourself.” Tao finally said, a bit more curtly then he would have liked. The stool spun so Tao turned toward the bar, not staring at the stranger anymore.
    “Whats a nice boy like you doing in a dirty mind like mine? I must buy you a drink.” 
    “No
    “Why not, sweetheart?”
    “Because you might drug it, asshole.”

    The man seemed honestly offended and he cocked his head to the side while leaning his elbow on the bar. “I’m not a creepy douche, you just looked sad and someone with such a pretty face should never look so sad.”
    Tao scoffed and rolled his eyes as he took another sip of his drink. “Well thanks for the concern but I’m fine.” He glanced over at the man and saw his face was flushed, but not from embarrassment. “Besides it looks like you’ve already have had a few.”
    A smile broke over the stranger’s face and he laughed loudly “Smart aren't you?”
    “Yes, I am, which is why I’m not going to let you buy me a drink.”
    “And a little bit sassy.”
    “Only when I’m drinking, when I’m sober I’m an angel.” Tao smirked and adjusted the bulky glasses on his face. 
    “Whats your name?”
    “Why should I trust you?”
    The man sighed and motioned to his body then Tao’s “I think that we know who the obvious winner would be if we fought.”
    Tao looked him over, he was considerably shorter and Tao did have a bit more muscle. 
    “Tao.”
    “Ooh, exotic.”
    “Shut up, whats yours.”
    “Andrew.” Andrew’s accent made the name sound better then it usually did.
    Tao nodded and then turned back to look behind the bar as he raised his drink to his lips.
    “So Tao what do you do for a living?”
    “I’m in school to become a surgeon.”

    “Really?” Andrew’s voice was more amazement then disbelief.
    “Really. What do you do?” 
    “Nothing special, I work in the FBI.”
    “What department?”
    “That’s classified.”
    “Doubt it.”
    “You don’t seem as impressed as people usually are.”
    “Once you hang around mutated people and dead bodies as much as I have, you start to get used to things.”
    Andrew ordered a drink when the bartender walked over, he then winked at Tao and leaned closer, reaching forward and poking him in the chest. “I forgot to tell you, I love your outfit.” 
    “Huh?” Tao looked down, he was wearing something he normally never wears but today he wanted to branch out plus he thought he was going to be going places tonight. He wore a dark brown sweater vest over a white button down with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He had on normal pants and a blue bow tie. 
    “You look like such a nerd.”
    “Hey!” Tao scowled and felt his face heat up as he again fixed his glasses.
    “A very cute nerd.”
    “Better.”
    A drink was set down in front of Andrew and he smiled at the bartender and gave her some cash. He then turned to Tao and held up his glass. “To the cute nerd.”
    “To me.”

    “You did what?”
    “No no, I really did, I really did! Why are you laughing at me!” Andrew smacked the shoulder of his new friend who had his head on the counter, laughing hysterically. 
    “You-you pushed your supervisor into a pool?” Tao banged his fist on the table, he wasn’t sure why it was so funny, he also wasn’t sure why Andrew’s voice seemed so soothing and sweet. Tao’s head felt light and free, his laugh seemed louder and his thoughts spilled out of his mouth like he had no filter in his brain.
    “You’re unbelievable.” 
    “Am I?” Andrew smirked, his hand rested on Tao’s knee but started to creep up to his thigh. 
    “You are.” Their faces were close, both of the men’s elbows rested on the counter and they were hunched close to each other. “You know, Tao, you’re probably the hottest guy I’ve ever met.”
    “I’m swooning.”
    “You should be, I’m a huge romantic.”
    “Are you?”
    “I am. I’ll have you know that if you called all of my ex boyfriends they would tell you that I am the most romantic boyfriend ever.” 
    “I’m sure that wouldn’t take long.”
    “Wow. That was uncalled for.”
    “Oops.”
    “I doubt you had many boyfriends either so shut up.”
    “I’ve never had one.” 
    Andrew’s eyes widen “How? You’re like....really hot.”
    “So I’ve been told.”
    “Tao I lost my virginity can I have yours?”
    “No, nor will I date you, if you’re going to ask that next.”
    “But you’ve never dated anyone, you need me.”
    “Yea no.”
    “Fine then I’m leaving.” Andrew stood.
    “What, come on you’re not going to leave just cause I won’t be your boyfriend don’t be one of those people.”
    “I’m going to need directions though.” He put on his coat.
    “To were?”
    “To your heart.” He smirked and winked at Tao.
    “You are ridiculous.”
    Andrew sat back down and took off his coat. “I will make you like me.”
    “No you won’t- what are you doing?” Tao glared at the ginger, who was reaching forward. 
    “Is there something in your eye?” 
    “What-”
    “Wait no, thats just a sparkle.” 
    “Oh my God.” 
    “Your body is 65% water and I’m thirsty.”
    “It’s 75% you idiot.” 
    “Are you Pikachu? Because you are shockingly beautiful.”
    “I’m going to smack you.”
    “How about me and you go back to my place and form a covalent bond.” 
    “Do you even know what that is?”
    “Awww Tao if you’re feeling down I can feel you up.” 
    “You are so drunk.”
    “I’m not drunk I’m just intoxicated by you.”
    “Please stop.” Tao had to smile, Andrew’s loopy grin making him look cuter then usual. Even though he persisted that Andrew was being an asshole, he couldn’t deny that he probably wanted the same thing that Andrew wanted.
    “If I followed you home would you keep me?”
    “If you followed me home I would pepper spray you in the face.”
    “Tao you’re so smart, you’re more special then relativity.” Andrew’s hand snacked up to his inner thigh and he grinned more then Tao didn’t stop him.
    “If you were oxygen, I would be an alkali metal so I could get in you and explode.” 
    Tao’s felt his face blush bright red, and not from alcohol. “You’re so annoying.” His seemed higher and he cursed himself when Andrew laughed and leaned forward.
    “Tao you’re a doctor, I think I might have Osteoporosis, it seems I have a serious bone condition. I’m going to need a very thorough check up.”
    “Okay, stop by the office and take off your pants.” 
    Andrew drew back, blinking at Tao with surprise. A smile grew over his face and he whispered into Tao’s ear “Why not just right here?”
    “Because public nudity is a-ah!” Andrew presses his lips to the skin under Tao’s ear, he dragged his tongue down to his jaw and he tilted his head, kissing down the taller man’s neck. Tao stretched up and moved his head to the side, giving Andrew more room to do want he wants. “See I knew you wanted-” Tao cut off his words and grabbed Andrew’s chin, forcing him to face him and he crashes lips against the ginger, moving his hands into the other man’s hair and gripping on tight as he roughly kisses him.
    The stool that Andrew sat on turned when he stood and spread out Tao’s legs, all while their mouths never part. Andrew’s hands dig into the nape of Tao’s neck as he presses up against him, almost growing inside the blond’s mouth as his tongue brushes against Tao’s bottom teeth. Both of the men’s knuckles were white from holding tightly onto the other, Andrew’s hands crept up Tao’s leg and he pinched the inside of his thigh causing Tao to whine into Andrew’s mouth, who then shushed with another open mouth kiss. 
    Tao’s head spun with adrenaline, how could he be doing this to someone he hasn’t even known for a whole day? A part of him wanted himself to draw back to refuse this but his whole body just ignored what his mind said and kept greedily touching Andrew, his hands desperately begging to feel his skin under his clothes. 
    There was a clink when Andrew took of Tao’s glasses and set the on the counter. “You won’t need those.” He purred and dove back down to kiss Tao, biting gently into his bottom lip to make Tao’s legs twitch.
    “But I can’t see.” He mumbled against the side of Andrew’s mouth.
    “I’ll guide you.” Hands cupped Tao’s face and he kissed him again making the taller man bend backwards from the force of Andrew’s lust. He felt his hands slide down and rest against smooth fabric and the curve of Andrew’s body made Tao’s pants feel a bit tighter.
    He tasted alcohol on Andrew’s lips but he knew that the ginger probably was tasting the same. Slight pain pulled at Tao’s scalp as the other youth pulled on his unruly blond hair. 
    “Hey! You can’t do that in here! Hey!” 
    A voice broke through the sensational trance that was running through them and they broke away, a line of saliva connecting their mouths. Fox grinned and brought his hand up to wipe it away, still not glancing at the person who yelled at them. He then glanced up seeing a ticked off dark skinned man with crossed arms. “Do it somewhere else or go.” 
    “Oh.” Tao’s voice surprised him, it sounded cracked and his face felt extremely hot, along with other parts of his body. He stood shakily, his legs feeling wobbly and Andrew caught him, his hands moving around his waist. “Do you wanna go to my place?” The ginger inclined his head to Tao with a hopeful look in his eyes.
    “Yes. Yes of course.” 


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Tue Feb 18, 2014 10:59 pm

    They stumbled out in the cold night, hands still all over each other in drowsy arousal. Tao turned once they stepped foot out of the restaurant, pressing his larger body against Andrew’s who went on his tippy toes for their lips to meet.
    “Do you have a car?” Andrew asked as his mouth traveled down to Tao’s throat.
    He could barely speak, the shorter man making every nerve in Tao’s body tingle “Yes.” he finally mumbled out.
    “Are you good to drive?”
    “I think so.”
    “Lets go, lets go now.”
    “Okay, okay.” Tao grabbed his hand and pulled him into the parking lot toward an old pickup truck. 
    “This is what you drive?” Andrew laughed as he jogged over to the car with Tao.
    “Shut up it’s not mine.” Tao grabbed him by the shoulder and pushed him back into the car, pressing him up against it as he trails kisses down his neck, hands fumble at his collar, begging for more skin to be revealed for him to touch.
    “Oh shit.” Andrew arched his back, his hands crawling up Tao’s chest and pulling at his vest. Tao broke away causing a whine to escape from the others lips.
    “Where do you live?” The two men got into the car, breathing heavily as they looked at each other, their eyes looking bright. Andrew reported the address to Tao and he started the car, driving out of the lot. Andrew looked over, his hands shaking from wanting to touch Tao, do feel his bare skin, to hear his moans. 
    Tao sped down the road, rushing through yellow lights and not even bothering to use a turn signal. They got to a large apartment building and Andrew slipped out of the truck and grabbed Tao’s wrist when he stepped out.
    “Hurry.”
    They rushed inside and Tao stifled a groan as Andrew put his hand on Tao’s neck and kissed him roughly, his hands then snaking around Andrew’s chest.
    The two slowly made their way up the stairs, their lips only parting when they tripped and started cracking up. The giggling drunk-on-alcohol-and-each-other boys slammed into Andrew’s door, laughing and mumbling against each others skin while doing so.
    Andrew grabbed the keys out of his back pocket and unlocked the door, pulling Tao inside and shutting the door. He flipped on the lights revealing a nicely furnished apartment with a messy kitchen and living room with a big TV and comfy sofa. 
    “Come on.” Andrew giggled and grabbed Tao’s hand dragging him towards a door on the far right. He opened up the door, not even bothering to turn on the lights before jumping into Tao’s arm and kissing him roughly, their teeth clinked together from the impact but neither one stopped, to consumed in each others bodies to even think about anything else.
    “W-wait.” Andrew gasped out and reached his hand out to hit the wall. “I want to see that beautiful body.” Tao felt his face flush even more then it already has and the lights in the room turned on but remained dimmed. Tao glanced around taking up the room, large bed, plush pillows and different posters. 
    Tao didn’t have much time to look around before Andrew pulled him toward the bed and pushed him down onto the bed. He stood at the foot of the bed as Tao propped himself up on his elbows, lays on his back and watches Andrew as he strips down, undoing the tie and throwing off his waist coat, his hands moved lighten quick to rip open his shirt exposing pale skin. Tao kicked off his shoes and only got time to take off his vest and bow tie before Andrew was crawling on top of him in only boxers.
    Andrew nipped at Tao’s neck, his tongue then dragging along his skin down to Tao’s collarbone. The blond’s eyes closed and he felt Andrew move so he straddled Tao, his cold hands slowly unbuttoning Tao’s shirt and then throwing it aside. 
    “Jesus Christ Tay...you’re gorgeous.” Andrew chuckled then ground down onto Tao, who arched up to meet him, fitting their bodies together like it might physically hurt if there was space between them. The heat of Tao’s skin sent chills down Andrew’s spine and their hungry kisses were traded for heady, fervent desire.
    Andrew started to trail his mouth down Tao’s chest, planting open mouth kisses everywhere he can reach, listening to Tao whimper in pleasure whenever the ginger one  touched the more sensitive spots 
    “Are these...freckles?” A drowsy explanation came from above Tao. 
    “Huh?” Tao’s eyes opened and he grinned. “Yea.”
    “How could I not have noticed?” The more Andrew looked the more he could see splotches of dots across Tao’s chest and stomach, all the way up his neck and hundreds of little freckles dotted their way across Tao’s face, along his nose, cheeks, and forehead. “I wonder how many more there are.” Mused Andrew as he played with the zipper on Tao’s pants. 
    Another whimper came out of Tao’s mouth and his hips twitched and bucked from wanting,  Andrew heard a nervous huff escape from Tao’s lips and he glanced up, catching the anxious look in the blond’s eyes. 
    “It’s okay.” Andrew whispered and his pale hand gently touched the side of Tao’s face. “I said I’ll guide you.” 
    Tao’s mouth opened but no words came out and he blinked up at Andrew, his back arching and the shorter one smirked and leaned back to pull down Tao’s pants, the blond’s shaking hands traveling up to slide up Andrew’s thighs. 
    A low growl rumbled from Andrew’s chest and he parted his lips as they sucked at the flesh of Tao’s neck. He couldn’t stop himself, the night of them flirting back and forth in the bar, watching Tao’s long legs adjust every time Andrew got a little to close to him and the faint blush that crept along his neck. Andrew couldn’t wait another moment, he needed to be closer.
    Impatient hands scrambled from Tao to the nightstand as he crawled off of the blond to yank open the drawer and grab a tiny bottle from it.
    “What are you-mmph!”
    Tao’s words were cut off when Andrew came crashing down back on top of him, kissing him with passion and desire while using his hands to pin Tao down and then he broke away again leaving Tao gasping for air. 
    A wicked smile graced itself upon Andrew’s features and he dug his fingertips roughly into the dips of Tao’s hipbones, helping to pull their bodies closer together for just a moment. Andrew sank down and pressed his lips against Tao’s exposed stomach, his hand gripping at Tao’s thigh, a trail of heated kisses following closely. 
    Andrew played with the hem of Tao’s boxers, his mouth getting closer to the taller’s hips and his teeth bit onto Tao’s boxers, starting to slide them down with his teeth. 
    “Holy...” Tao arched his back up and moans quietly. “Hurry.” He whispered as hands grappled into Andrew’s hair. 
    “Begging for it now aren’t you?” Andrew’s voice was husky as he looked over Tao with wide and ready eyes.
    “Shut up.” Tao sat up and grabbed Andrew’s chin, forcing him to look up at deeply kiss him back. Noisily, Andrew frantically crawled back toward Tao, causing him to lean back and he pressed agains’t him, begging for more. 


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Sun Feb 23, 2014 12:15 am

    Monday is your least favorite, you moan and groan about it all Sunday night to 4:30 A.M. when I have to get up. It starts out slow, I wake when my alarm goes off, you hold me down, your pale arms wrap around me and you mumble into my neck to stay and I obey but only for another thirty minutes. Your hair is messy still when I step out of the shower, lazily shrugging on your jeans and shirt while you whine about your annoying boss and I love you.
    Tuesday and your rummaging around the apartment trying to sort the things you have to do for the week. Your mouth moving a mile a minute as you stumble across the floor to your bag and you pull out crumpled papers. I’m still sitting on the sofa, sipping quietly on coffee and nodding along to your words.You stop briefly to kiss the freckles on my nose and cheeks, asking me about my day and you curl up against my shoulder and I love you.
    Wednesday and your quietly sprawled on the couch while I’m working late and once I get home I see you, patting the spot next to you until I drop down next to you and bury my head against your shoulder, closing my eyes and letting the smell of you greet me and wash away the hardship of the day. Your pepper kisses into my hair and rub my back because it’s my least favorite day of the week (and you know it) and I love you.
    Thursday and you’re wondering what the weekend will bring as I hand you your coffee. You lean against the counter and moan about how the week is going by way to slow for your tastes and you stick your tongue out at me when I roll my eyes at you. Once I get home you tackle me with kisses and questions about what we should do tomorrow.
    Friday and I’m on the floor surrounded by DVDs and snacks you’ve prepared while I was gone. Pillows are strewn around you and you smile brightly at me, I smile back, drinking up the happiness from your eyes. You welcome me with blankets and warmth from your arms and I immediately fold up against you as we watch one of your shows your always going on about and I love you. 
    Saturday and you’re feeling lazy even though you protested that you would get some work done. You won’t let me leave your arms (or is it the other way around?) but I don’t complain. I’m tucked under your chin as we both wonder how much time we have left before sleep makes us miss each other’s faces and I have to get up to do some stupid errand in the morning and I love you.
    Sunday and I sit across from you at our kitchen table, staring softly as your hands work at the keyboard of your laptop. We don’t speak for awhile, sitting silently, comfortably with each other because there’s nothing much to say but I love you. 


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Mon Feb 24, 2014 11:35 pm

    I learned three things about Neer Cotter over the course of our ‘date.’
    One: He hates snow.
    Two: He had a little sister.
    Three: He has a bunch of strange cuts and scraps on his hands and I still did not know why.
    I learned these things while sitting in a coffee shop near a big window, the whole time thinking that this looked like a cheesy movie.
    When it started to snow outside, Neer scrunched up his nose and got an annoyed look on his face, I asked him what was wrong and he said he hated snow, he slips a lot, its wet, and he likes to be able to see his feet clearly. 
    A silver necklace dangled around his neck, I caught the shine of it for a quick moment when the sun hit it and being my ignorant self, asked him about it. His reply was quick, he had a little sister who gave it to him. Neer looked away when I questioned more and I saw the tinge of pinks on his cheeks and stopped pressuring him.
    It was hard not to notice Neer’s large hands, clumsy when holding things but graceful on a keyboard. Whenever he would look away, I would take a small glance at his hands and notice the scraps and cuts along them. Scabs dotted knuckles and his skin was dry. But I didn’t comment.
    I saw Neer Cotter three days later while working. He was sitting at the tiny table in the very corner of the restaurant, his eyes flickered up to meet mine and I smiled tentatively at him but didn’t go over until it was the end of my shift.
    I haven’t had any contact with the rest of my neighbors since the incident at the ‘party’, which was fine, I didn’t want to talk to them.
    Neer came to the restaurant everyday during my shifts, he walked in only a couple minutes after I entered and by the end of the week he was already there, like he was waiting for me.
    To be honest, I was scared, he kept staring at me and its not like I couldn’t see him, I clearly could, but I never said anything. Actually I never even went over there, I just smile and waved and then exited out the back when my shift was over.
    I kept avoiding him, I felt bad to, his large hazel eyes would stare me down while I mixed drinks. But I resisted.
    I made sure to check when he let his house, like everyone else in the building, I made up a schedule for Neer to, figuring out when he left his apartment.
    The thing that bugged me though was that he was inconsistent, always leaving and coming back and random times, the only regular thing he has done day after day was go to the restaurant to write, I could hear him leaving at 4:30 A.M. and coming back at 11:00 P.M. or he could be leaving at 11 and coming back at 4, it was always something new with Neer. 
    He didn’t have a set laundry day like everyone else, I was always nervous when I went down there, he probably new when I went done, he seemed attentive.
    I made sure to dress properly when I went to wash my clothes, to scared to be caught down there in my underwear like I did the first time we met.
    The next week, I was sitting on a bench in one of the parks, a book sat in my lap while the wind breezed through my hair.
    I hadn’t gotten a chance to do anything to innocent and relaxing for a while and it felt great. The noises of other humans were just background music because my mind was to busy catching up on the latest John Green book. 
    I barely noticed the shadow darken my view on the page the only thing that got me to look up was the clearing of a throat.
    My neck snapped my head up and my eyes met with familiar large puppy dog eyes.
    Neer stood in front of me, he had on a large black jacket and comfy looking sweatpants, a dark baseball cap was on his head, covering his light brown hair. 
    “What are you reading?” Neer’s voice was soft, like he hadn’t spoken in a while and wasn’t quite used to it.
    I held up the book and he nodded with a tiny grin on his face, I had to smile back, he started to blush but I don’t think it was from the cold.
    “Are you going to sit?” My own words surprised me.
    “No.” That surprised me even more.
    “Some where to be?”
    “Sorta, I just wanted to give you this.” Neer reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a crumpled paper. He mumbled quietly “I just thought you might like to have it.”  
    “Thank you.” I didn’t know what it was, I didn’t really care, I was just curious. My hand reached out to take the paper and his fingers brushed against mine for a second before he placed the ball of crumpled paper into my hand. My hands were tiny compared to his.
    He nodded “See ya around.” I didn’t get the chance to say anything else before he turned around and jogged down the path.
      I watched him until I couldn’t see him anymore then I put my book down and slowly opened up the paper.
    My eyes skimmed over it, the words were typed onto it and I finally realized what it was. The notes Neer was taking while interviewing me.
    They weren’t even complete sentences, just bullets of the stuff I told him and in pencil there were arrows and underlines all around the page.
    But I didn’t focus on any of that, I flipped the page over and noticed tiny little print at the far corner of the page, a column of neatly printed words in short lines and my eyes widened as I struggled to read it.

    “I’m all out of air,
    all my breath you have stolen,
    but the words remain.”


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Wed Feb 26, 2014 1:21 am

    There was a little blue couch that sat in Aditi’s room, barely a couch, a chair, a large comfy chair. She would curl up inside of it, her body doesn’t even fill the whole thing and she would grab a book and read for hours in that blue chair. 
    It was her chair, it has always sat in the far corner of her large room, on her side, not her sister’s, Who wouldn’t dare to sit in it anyway because it is ‘ratty’. But Aditi loved it, it was home, that chair was home. The night when she got home for break, she went upstairs to sleep, her eyes closed as she walked through the hall to her room, the familiar scent almost guiding her around. She opened the creaky door and looked around the large room, posters covering the wall. The blue chair sat in the corner, undisturbed. Aditi still remembers walking over and seeing her butt print which was left there.
    It has been years since then, and the blue chair still sat in the same spot. 
    Except now, Aditi’s little part of home was shared with another.
    The chair felt even more comfy when your curled up against your 6.5ft alien girlfriend who keeps running her fingers through your hair.
    Indigo had insisted that she stay with Aditi, she “needed to watch over her tiny human”, which brought her a punch in the arm from Addy, even though she agreed.
    Blankets were wrapped around them, Indigo grabbed them from Aditi’s bed, she laid them over their tangled bodies. Indigo didn’t quite fit on the chair like her girlfriend did but she made do, her long legs dangling over the arm of the chair and she leaned against the other side, Aditi sat next to her, legs crisscrossing over Indy’s. 
    The shorter girl’s head leaned against the other’s shoulder, Indigo rested her chin on top of Aditi’s head, her colorful eyes are wide and interested, staring at the book in the other girls hands. Her mouth moved with the words but she never had enough time to finish even a page because Aditi would flip it so quickly that Indigo would doubt that she’s even reading it. 
    Minutes of comfortable silence passed, their bodies pressed up against each other but neither squirmed for anything more. 
    Aditi yawned, breaking the quiet and her partner kissed the top of her head, taking a deep whiff of her ebony hair while doing so and smiling. 
    Addy snorted, she dropped the book to the ground, turning in Indigo’s grip and burying her head into her shoulder. Indy smiled more, her long canines peeking over her bottom lip. Her hand lifted and grazed over Aditi’s cheek, her skin contrasting with the smaller girls darker caramel. 
    Fingertips brushed against Addy’s mouth and along her jaw, down to her neck then rubbing the back of it, bringing her head closer to lightly kiss her between the eyebrows, making Aditi giggle and close her eyes. Then response made Indigo’s eyes sparkle and she kissed down her nose then on both of her cheeks, her large hands cupping Addy’s fragile looking head. Her short wavy hair was pushed back by Indigo, revealing her entire face and more giggles erupted out of Aditi’s mouth. 
    Her face felt hot, Indigo was the only one who could make her giggle, all she had to do was stare into Aditi’s eyes and it made Addy feel dizzy. Their gazes broke, Aditi crashed forward, her face smushing up against Indigo’s warm neck. Indy almost immediately, as if it were instinct, moved her arms around her, locking the short girl up against her and kissing the side of her head as reassurance she was still there. 
    Indigo’s thumb made circles around the back of Aditi’s neck, the rest of her fingers dipping around to the side of her throat.
    Addy was till, her soft touch lulling her to sleep. They did nothing all did yet they were still dead tired. 
    Indigo smiled down at Aditi, her own eyes closed as she kissed her head once more, her other handing running through Addy’s soft hair, thinking it was unbelievable how she could fall asleep anywhere. Even in the blue chair.


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Sat Mar 01, 2014 8:13 pm

    Sun light made the blond in Tao’s hair seem like a halo, like he was a beautiful angel sent from heaven to grace himself upon humanity. His cheek was smushed into the pillow, quiet snores making his freckles nose scrunch up. His hair was wild, going in every directions, chills went down Andrew’s back thinking about the softness of that hair in his tight grip. 
    He woke up about an hour ago, slipping out of the warm embrace of Tao, resentfully untangling their legs and going to take a quick shower. Dressed in warm clothes he slipped back into bed, laying on his side and looking at the man next to him, thinking how ridiculous it is that a grown man is that adorable. 
    Andrew smile, he usually didn’t let his one night stands stay, but he didn’t want Tao to be just that, he wanted more. It was odd, he felt attracted to Tao, in way he has never liked anyone before. He had a strong desire to just lay with him, to just rest in those freckled arms and it was weird.
    Tao stirred, his large gray eyes blinking open and a tiny kitten like yawn escaped his lips.
    “Morning sweetheart.” 
    “Good morning.” Tao blushed and sat up, the blankets falling down to his waist and Andrew heard himself sigh. That morning voice.
    “Did you sleep well?” 
    “Considering I barely slept at all, yes.” 
    “Thats good.” Andrew leaned forward, pressing his lips to Tao’s not even caring about either of their morning breath. 
    They broke away and it didn’t feel awkward at all as Tao got into the shower and out on his wrinkled clothes from the night before.
    “So...I can call you?” They stood at the door, Tao’s voice soft and curious, he was even nervous to ask that. It didn’t sound like the same voice from the night before, the hesitant but controlling voice of last night. 
    “I’m expecting you to.”
    “Proud aren’t you?” a sly smirk tugged at the corner of Tao’s mouth and Andrew grinned more. 
    “A little.”
    “I’m also guessing you put your number into my phone.”
    Andrew chuckled “You know me to well, Tay.” his tone was mocking and the taller blond rolled his eyes before shrugging on his coat. 
    “But yes.” Andrew grabbed at the collar of Tao’s coat to yank him into a rough kiss. “Call me.” 
    “Okay.” Tao said dreamily and he stumbled out the door, smiling back at Andrew once more before walking down the stairs to the lobby to leave.
    Andrew watched him as he left, once Tao as completely out of sight he closed the door and leaned against it wondering when he would see Tao Evans again. 


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Wed Mar 05, 2014 10:14 pm

    The encounter at the park was two weeks ago and now instead of me avoiding Neer, it was him avoiding me. 
    I kept that paper, smoothing it out so it wasn’t so crumpled, I read those words everyday and felt a little stab in my heart at every word. I still read them though, over and over again.
    Neer stopped going to the restaurant and at first I was relieved, what do you even say to someone who wrote something like that for you?
    The more the days went by the more antsy I got, he obviously was more embarrassed about it then I was. 
    I never saw him around the building either, it was like he just disappeared. Kendal was no help either, every time I asked about him she just gave me a cheeky smile and poked my shoulder until I slapped her hand away and told her to fuck off.
    I was ashamed of myself when my eyes kept glancing at the door, waiting for a cranky looking man to enter but he never did.
    By Thursday of the second week I was bored, Neer was probably the most exciting thing going on in my life, as pathetic as it sounds, and I missed our short awkward talks. After work I ran up the stairs to my floor and pressed my ear up to Neer’s door, not breathing at all as I tried to listen for footsteps.
    At first I heard nothing but I tried to just focus on what was behind that door. 
    Finally, there was the faint vibrations of music, but I couldn’t make out the words. I smiled and stood back lifting my hand to knock but then dread hit me like a train and I realized what in the world was I even trying to do? I had no plan, no small talk prepared, I had nothing. 
    Idiot.
    I couldn’t face Neer, I couldn’t speak to him without choking up or crying or something even worse. Not yet at least. 
    I grabbed my keys and unlocked the door to my own room, I scanned the room quickly while my cat gently rubbed his head against my shin and my dog licked my hand. I scratched in between Maliha’s ears real quick before taking off my shoes and shutting the door. 
    My printer sat right next to my desk, a carton of paper right under it and an idea sprung into my head. I grabbed a piece of paper and sat down at my desk with a sharpie, uncapping it with my teeth and then putting words down onto the paper. 

    I liked your poem. 

    Feeling satisfied by the simplicity of my message I folded up the paper and opened up my door again, Crispen right on my heels as I bent down in front of Neer’s door and slipped under the paper then knocked quickly twice but rushing back into my room with Crispen following.
    I slid down on the other side of my door, blushing wildly from my own humiliation. I giggled and picked up Crispen.
    “Your momma’s an idiot.” I whispered against his soft head and he just meowed back. Through my closed door I heard the creaking of Neer’s opening and I stood, looking through the peephole to see the distorted figure of Neer. 
    He had simple black sweatpants but his chest was bear and my cheeks felt even hotter. 
    He picked up the paper and read it, his face immediately going bright red and he slouched, his eyes skimming over the words again and again until he hurried back inside away from my view. I smirked and sat back down against my door, listening to the heavy footsteps of Neer as he ran into his apartment and slammed the door.
    Maliha trotted over, her rough tongue wetting my cheek and I giggled more, turning my head and pressing my lips to her wet noise. She snorted and kept licking my face even when I tried to push her away.
    My heart started to pound. It might have been a mistake to send a message to Neer, maybe it was to soon to even talk to him, maybe we shouldn’t be friends. Maybe-
    All of my worried stopped when a white paper was slipped under my door and the sound of clumsy feet were in the hall. I smiled, unable to hold in my amusement as I imagined blushing Neer using his big hands to write a message to me and then bending down to put it under my door.
    I crawled over to the paper an lifted it up, unfolding it to read his message.



    Thanks I'm glad you do


    “Thanks I’m glad you do.” I mimicked in my best man voice and I felt a blush creeping over my cheeks, my finger tracing over the indents of Neer’s handwriting, it looked like Neer drove the pen into the paper so hard that I could see the marks on the other side.
    I grabbed my sharpie and put down another message then opened my door and sat down in front of Nee’rs door.


    You made it up yourself right?


    I slipped the paper back under his door and after a few seconds a shadow came over the ground and I heard a tiny flop. The paper was grabbed and I bent over and saw a black sock on the other side of the door but the rest of Neer’s body was shielded by the door.
    Scribbling was apparent and I pressed my ear against the door, listening to the shuffling of Neer on the other side. Then the white paper was pushed under the door and I snatched it up, greedily unfolding the paper for the message.


    Yes, I made it up myself.


    I rolled my eyes. Quite the talker Neer is. I couldn’t stop myself from smiling, which was pathetic. 
    I wrote down my response and slipped it back under.


    How did you think of it?


    I just did 


    That was quick.
    Something burst in me, I was bubbling over like a giggly school work and I wanted to slap myself but I also wanted to pass more notes to my mysterious neighbor. 
    I hadn’t felt like that in...well I never felt like that in my life. 


    You weren’t thinking of anyone?


    No 


    Cause you did write it on the back of a paper that was all about me sooooo


    His answer to that one took a bit longer for him to answer.


    Don’t be so full of yourself.


    Rude




    You’re the rude one.


    How am I the rude one


    You were mean<-----hahaha thats funny


    Furball


    That doesnt even make sense


    I can hear your furball dog panting outside my door


    She says hi


    Whats her name


    Maliha


    Interesting name


    really? your name is NEER who names their child neer, who please tell me who


    My parents 


    Your parents are weird


    I know. 


    Neer and Strife. I dont understand


    Serena isnt a normal name either


    yea but serena is a pretty name


    True


    Neer Cotter are you flirting with me.


    no


    you always so blunt?


    yes


    good to know
    yea


    Do you wanna hang out sometime


    we already hang out


    not since youve been avoiding me for 2 weeks

    about that



    about that


    about that, i was not avoiding you


    you werent


    i wasnt i was busy


    with what


    writing 


    poems about your secret crush, the same secret crush whom you wrote the first poem for, the poem that you gave to me


    I dont have a secret crush


    i do


    who


    im not telling you, you dont deserve to know


    then you dont deserve to know mine


    fine
    fine


    hey. do you wanna go to the movies tomorrow, i hear the idiots upstairs are throwing a party and ill feel down on myself if i have to stay here and listen to it


    yes




    yes you wanna go to the movies or yes their annoying


    yes


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Fri Mar 07, 2014 10:33 pm

    “Well hi there.”
    Neer Cotter and Serena Watson sat on there old brown couch, both with bowls of cereal in their hands. Neer sat at the very end while Serena leaned against the arm on the other side, her legs thrown onto her boyfriends lap. 
    When Tao walked in they both stared at his loopy expression for a couple seconds before Serena smiled widely. 
    “Hi.” Tao said.
    “Out all night eh?”
    “Yes.” Tao walked by them, giddily skipping into the kitchen area and grabbing a bowl.
    “Not like you, Tao.” Neer said as he looked at his roommate “Not like you at all.”
    Tao shrugged and looked at the floor while walking over and plopping down on the chair across from the couch.
    “Who is she?”
    “Who said that I even...ya know.”
    “Come on.” Serena rolled her eyes “Your clothes are a mess, your blushing like crazy, and Tao never ever stays late at work without telling me. Plus Kendal saw you with someone.”
    “So she did show!”
    “Yea she did, but she left right when she saw you flirting it up.”
    Tao blushed more.
    “So who is she?”
    “Well its not a she.” Serena and Neer both ‘oohed’ ,“Shut up.”
    “Come on tell us!” The two leaned forward.
    “His name is Andrew, he is British, he works in the FBI, and he is quite nice.”
    “Nice. Nice as in ‘awww he’s so sweet’ or nice as in ‘holy shit that guy made me scream’.” Serena spoke seriously, like this wasn’t even an awkward subject. 
    Tao thought for a second, he was already hung over and a little bit giddy why not answer honestly.
    “Both.” 
    “Neer. Both.”
    “I heard.”
    “Neer, both, Neer it’s the chosen one.”
    “We have been saved.”
    “Thank the Lord for the Messiah has come.” 
    Tao laughed lightly, at times his moody roommates where bitter and sarcastic but on rare occasions they were idiots. 
    “I think you’re taking it one step to far.”
    “Tao. Come on this is the guy, the guy.”
    The blonde sighed and put his bowl on the table in between the couch and the chair, he stood up and stared them down for a second. “I’m done with this conversation.” 
    Serena shrugged and waved to him as Tao went to his room and shut the door. He flopped on the bed, sighing against the soft sheets and smiling. 
    He couldn’t stop thinking of the night before: the goosebumps he could clearly feel on Andrew’s skin, the heat of their skin pressed together as both of the men’s hips grinded, the choked moans that rang out in the pitch black, the bang of the headboard, everything. 
    Tao just kept thinking about as he rolled onto his back, looking up at the ceiling and wishing that Andrew was here to. He thought it was silly that he could like some guy he just met so much but Andrew caused him to feel things he had never felt before and it’s not like he could just forget that so easily. 
    His head still pounded but he didn’t even care. Tao was just to happy and to dizzy to care about the aching headache, but it was no big deal he figured he’ll just take some Advil and nap and it will be fine. 
    The thought of the charming ginger was on Tao’s mind as he fell asleep, his light eyes, pale skin, soft lips, Tao was surprised he didn’t dream about Andrew. He almost wished he did though. 


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Mon Mar 17, 2014 1:04 am

    “Are you a psychopath?” I said suddenly while popping a piece of popcorn into my mouth. Neer stood in front of me, shuffling through our tickets so he could hand them to the usher. 
    “Pretty sure I’m not.”  
    “Pretty sure?”
    “Yes...yes.”
    I felt myself smile and we walked down the hall after the employee handed us back our ticket, our theater happened to be at the very end and not many people were there at the movies tonight. We walked in silence for a few minutes, the quiet like a drum in my ear as I wished for someone to walk by. 
    “Serena?”
    “Yea?” I turned my head, I didn’t expect Neer to say anything.
    “I-...nothing.” His gaze fell back to the floor and I felt the tension in my shoulders flow away but my relief was quickly replaced with disappointment. 
    “Okay.” I said back but didn’t say anything else. 
    When we got to our theater Neer opened the door and the entire theater was empty. A shock of fear went through me and I saw it in Neer’s eyes too. I made myself laugh lightly. “Wow...no one here, we got lucky huh?”
    “Yea.”
    I saw the seats that are in front of the bars and waved Neer over, we plopped down and got adjusted. Come on Serena, make him your friend, do it. 
    “Hey Neer?”
    “Hm?”
    “Do you like candy?”
    “I think everyone does.”
    “Well.” I bent down and grabbed a few packs out of my bag “I snuck some in.”
    Neer’s eyes widened and his large hand moved forward to grab a pack. “I didn’t even notice.”
    “I’m a ninja.”
    “You’re a furball.”
    I laughed “Excuse me?” 
    Neer gestured to me “Your hair.”
    “My hair? Whats wrong with my hair?”
    “Nothing, your hair is pretty, I meant its fluffy.” 
    My cheeks got hot and my palms felt sweaty. All of a sudden I felt like a middle schooler again who just got a valentine. I tilted my head to look at Neer out of my peripheral vision and I could see he stopped mid movement from opening the candy to stare into space, his face was redder then mine. 
    And I laughed. 
    They weren’t cute laughs either, they were full on snort-and-clap-your-hands-like-a-retarded-seal laugh. 
    “Y-your face!”
    “Shut up!”
    “You look so terrifi-fied!”
    “Hey, don’t laugh at my pain.”
    “Your pain? Ha! Thats laughable.”
    “You are mean. You are a mean, mean lady.”
    “Eat your candy that I smuggled in for you.” 
    “This is illegal candy, I am breaking the law.”
    “Eat it!” I pegged a box at Neer and he caught it. “Thats not fair.” I whined but he smirked and opened his mouth to say something but the loud blast of music came from the sides of the theater and the movie started. 
    I started to get more glad that no one was there as the movie went on. The more the time passed the more we acted like eight year olds. Neer hoarded an entire box of candy from me and ate it by the hand fulls while I kicked him in the shins, I through the certain kinds I don’t like at him and I almost fell to the ground laughing when Neer caught one in his mouth. 
    I have no idea what that movie was about. I don’t know which famous celebrity stared it in and I don’t even know the name. 
    Instead I learned that Neer only likes to eat blue m&ms and scowls at me whenever I take one, I learned that Neer hates shorts, I learned that Neer runs his hands through his hair when he’s nervous, I learned that if Neer is interested in something his eyes will widen like a little kid.
    He doesn’t like to share his feelings and he doesn’t laugh to much but once you make him, its the most wonderful thing. 
    “Get me more popcorn.”  I held out the bag to him and he sighed, stood up and walked past me, but not without squishing against my seat first. I yowled and smacked him on the butt when he moved by, I heard a tiny yelp and I giggled as he walked away from me. 
    I curled up in my seat, bringing my arms around my knees and tried to pay attention to the movie, but it was ending and there was no point in getting popcorn. 
    When Neer came back he scowled at me after glancing at the end credits that were rolling on the screen. “Seriously?” He said and stomped over to me, pretending to be mad. 
    “I wanted popcorn.” I shrugged and stole and piece from the bag. 
    We gathered up our stuff and Neer held onto the popcorn to block me from taking any. 
    It’s been a week since the passing notes incident, we still passed notes. Every day after work I would slip a note under his door with just: Hi and he would usually do the same to me. We finally agreed to see this movie and at first I regretted the decision but, walking out into the brisk night with Neer and looking over to see the wind mess up his hair so it swirled around his head and then settled like a mop, I would never regret the ridiculous fun I had tonight. 
    The theater was only a couple blocks from out apartment building so we had walked from there. We turned the corner to make our way down the street, the glow of a traffic light hitting me. 
    I turned my head to look at Neer, who was staring right at me. His angular face was tinted red from the light, I noticed the dark circles under his eyes and a strand of hair fell into his face when he quickly looked away.
    We walked in silence down the street, but not the same kind of silence as before, a comfortable quiet. Neither of us felt the need to say anything, our shoulders occasionally brushed and Neer would jump away then play it off like he was fine. 
    Neer politely opened the door for me and we stepped into the apartment building.  Another polite nod then we made out way up the stairs, again in complete silence. 
    “That was really fun.” My voice came out small like I was testing it for the first time. 
    “Yea.” Neer agreed hoarsely and nodded. 
    The back of my neck felt hot and it felt like the hallway in between our rooms was getting tighter and tighter and I took a tiny step back from Neer who quickly did the same.
    “Goodnight.” I waved to him as I opened my door.
    “I’ll...I’ll see you right?”
    A tiny laugh came from my lips and I smirked “Of course, Neer Cotter, your stuck with me now.” 


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    Dear Andrew

    Post  Admin on Sat Mar 29, 2014 7:35 pm

    Dear Fox,

    When I was young my mother had me send letters to her when she was away on trips and couldn’t bring me. It felt better, even though she could just email me but it was nice coming home and seeing a letter just for me. She would send me a picture of her and whatever beautiful scenery was around her. I figured I could do this for you to right? I know you’re going to hate it and probably whine about writing but please try, I want to see your handwriting, something yours and something physical. I miss you, answer soon. 

    Love,
    Tao



    Dear Fox, 

    The other day I had a patient come in who had bright ginger hair like yours, she had green eyes and was shy so not quite like you. When I saw her I got to excited for my own good, she had asthma which reminded me to much of your addiction. I had to go through an examination with her, she broke her wrist. She didn’t cry though, she didn’t even wince when I handled her arm. I felt bad. I don’t know why though. I think I’m losing my doctoryness. That’s not a word. I can’t think of words. I’m turning into you. 

    Love, 
    Tao


    Dear Fox, 

    A patient died from cancer. He was seven and had gone through months of chemo. I was walking back from lunch and heard from a nurse he was dead. I went to go comfort the parents but he had none. His parents died in the war. I didn’t know that, I just went to give him check ups. He was sweet and asked me about my life whenever I went in, not that I had much to report. But he’s dead now. I cried. I never did before but know it seems the littlest things can break me. I used to think that the human life was small, nothing but a fraction. But I was cold and I regret it, I regretted it right away when I met you too. Human life is sacred. 

    Love,
    Tao




    Dear Fox,

    Leo called me the other day to ask me how I’m doing, but I feel fine. I feel like I’m floating. I wonder how you feel.


    Love,
    Tao



    Dear Fox,

    I had a patient named Andrew and I traded with another doctor for someone else. I can’t hear that name anymore. I can barely write it. I love you. I want to hear it more, but not for someone else, only for you. Only you. 

    I love you
    Tao


    Dear Andrew,

    I can’t sleep. I can’t eat. I need to see you, I might come home soon, I miss you. When I come home be ready for me. I love you I love you I love you I love you. I really do miss you, I can hear your voice mocking me now. 

    Love 
    Tao


    Dear Andrew, 

    When I walked into our apartment I didn’t expect it to be so empty, I never expected to be greeted with silence from a place that was once so full of life and joy and late nights watching your favorite shows, building pillow forts, sitting on the balcony and watching you blow smoke into the breeze and not being able to stop smiling because you’re here and I love you. I looked in the mirror and can picture you standing in front of it everyday, I imagine your skinny frame getting healthier from me shoveling food into you. I’m sitting on the same bed where I drunkenly asked you to marry me and were you giddily said yes. I’m on the same bed that we jumped on and danced to indy music. I’m on the same bad where we kissed and touched and gasped and moaned and screamed and laughed and loved. But now the sheets are clean and pulled up tight and my tears stain the pillows. 

    All my love
    Tao


    Andrew,

    This is my last day here, I’m off to work on the front line as an army doctor. I’m scared Andrew, I haven’t done this in so long yet it feels like second nature to me. I never realized how I accepted your death. It feels wrong to write it. I haven’t written you letter in so long, they have been spread out, I’ve stared at the pen, refusing the write until I received your answer back. Maybe I was scared. Maybe I still am. But your answer of course never came. Some how I accepted it, I don’t remember how. I have been in denial for so long. I miss you more then I miss my sanity. Maybe because you are my sanity. I was never sane before you came along, I was crazy, I never cried and when I did I screamed and kicked and slammed into things. I felt distant and unattached, I love my friends, I loved them but I was to scared to get to close. I still can see you sitting on the side of the road smoking a cigarette and smirking at me. I can still remember you crying and I can still remember your bruised face time and time again and I can still remember your broken form curled up in the back of the van. But it’s getting harder to imagine the feel of your skin and the brush of your hair. I see your smile slipping away and I see our hands letting go.


    Tao


    Andrew,

    I’ve spent a month here so far. I forget my age, how old am I? I’m not a child anymore, I’m not a teenager either. I might be, technically. Am I? It doesn’t seem like it. I don’t think I am. I feel older. I feel scrapes against my skin and I feel your voice calmly telling me what to do as I go through surgeries left and right. I feel old. I feel like a grown up. I feel wiser and stronger and quicker and sharper. I feel weak and vulnerable and scared and alone. I feel like I don’t know who I am. I feel like I could break down mountains and I feel like I could jump off a bridge. I feel like I’m lost.

    Tao?



    Andrew, 

    It’s been a year since I dared write to you again. I think of you every day but I’ve stopped looking at your picture like I used to. I sleep in the middle of my bed instead of the side and I make enough coffee for just me. But don’t think I do not still love you. I love you more then I ever have. I love you and I love you again. I try to block you out though, every memory of you killing me. I can’t. The harder I push you away the more I see you everywhere. I see you in the dead soldier I wrapped up, I see you in passing cars and I see you sitting on my chair. I hear you too. I heard your silver voice say ‘Ya want one Tao?’ as one of the guys offered me a cigarette. And you know Andrew? I did. 

    Yours



    Andrew

    We are going on a dangerous mission. I saw Kendal. I think I saw her. And Strife. They said some words to me. I don’t know what they were. We set off tomorrow I think, I’m not sure. I’m going. I’m not scared. I’m not scared. I feel brave. I feel brave because I feel stupid. I don’t know whats happening anymore. They won’t let me preform surgeries. I spend most of my days on my balcony anyway. 

    Come back


    Dear Beloved Andrew 

    A month ago I was captured by the YES and I still have no idea where I am. I’m in a dark room. I have been beaten. I am let out with other prisoners sometimes. I was in a cell with one of them for a while but then I was moved. I don’t know why. I think it was because one day one of them was gone one day. I think I might have killed him. It was very blurry though. Dear Andrew, I am ashamed, you would be ashamed of me as well. Dear Andrew, I hear talk from the guards. Liberation comes. I don’t want to be liberated. Dear Andrew they test us. Dear Andrew, I never got to tell my brother I love him. Dear Andrew, I never got to tell you that I love you. Dear Andrew, I am scared again. Dear Andrew, I have been poked with so many needles my fingers are numb. Dear Andrew, I stole one of them. Dear Andrew, I scraped off my skin. Dear Andrew, the wall of my little cell is light. Dear Andrew, my blood is much brighter then I thought it was. Dear Andrew, I miss you. I miss my friends to. I miss my baby brother. I miss my family. I miss my mom. I miss my mom who I never got to say I loved before she died. Dear Andrew, I wonder if you miss your family. Dear Andrew, I’ve been so tired. Dear Andrew, I do not want any more people to hurt me. Dear Andrew ,I want my brother to be okay because I love him. Dear Andrew, I want Kendal and Strife’s unborn child to grow up in a peaceful world. Dear Andrew, I do not want to live in a world without peace anymore. Dear Andrew, I miss you but everyday a prisoner is put into the room in the far end of the hall and they never come out. Dear Andrew, I heard that tomorrow the same with happen to me. Dear Andrew, I am scared. Dear Andrew, I am happy. Dear Andrew, I am confused. Dear Andrew. I love you. 


    Tao Evans  


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Sat Mar 29, 2014 10:13 pm

    “If you flick my head one more time-”
    I giggled and reached forward, flicking the back of Neer’s shaggy head and he growled. 
    Extra shifts suck ass, I thought at the beginning of this night. I needed the money, expenses were pilling up and I didn’t really feel like taking another job. Thankfully, Neer was kind enough to stay, even after I whined at him to go, I didn’t want his pity. 
    There was only a couple people at the restaurant, I usually leave earlier so I had never experienced it like this before. It was quiet, only the steady hum of the ovens in the back really making any noise. A few people scattered about in tables, typing on laptops like Neer, or drinking a cup of coffee with a friend. 
    “Sorry.” 
    I got bored, dishing out cakes and coffee isn’t fun, but casually flicking Neer and watching him whip around was. 
    I crashed down into the seat across from him, my boss to distracted in the back to notice, no one needed me right now. 
    “What are you writing?” I asked and propped my elbows up on the table. 
    “An article.”
    “On?”
    “Stuff. Oh hey the article I did with you got published do you want a copy?”
    “No.”
    Neer finally looked up from his keyboard “Why not?” His voice dripped with worry and I laughed lightly and shook my head.
    “I’ll want to read it eventually just...not now okay?” 
    “Well, alright.”
    “I’ll explain it you to sometime.”
    “No, you don’t have to.” Neer’s eyes softened from worry to understanding and he looked back down, content with how the conversation went. 
    “My boss needs me.” I slid out of the booth and smiled at Neer, even though he wasn't looking at me. 
    “I think I’m going to head home anyway.” He said and shut his laptop. 
    “Aw, you’re not even going to wait for me?” I put my head on my hip and pouted.
    Neer looked up at me and smiled “Sorry, I’m tired.” 
    “It’s okay, go, get your ten hours of sleep.”
    He stood up after closing his laptop and putting it in his bag. Neer stood in front of me and for a second looked like he might do something but then jerked back. 
    “Bye.” He said quickly and rushed out the door, leaving me to confused silence.
    “Bye.”


    Green wide eyes, blond lashes matching golden hair, faint specks of mascara dotted under her eyes. Dark circles from restless nights aged her young face, sloping down, high prominent cheekbones, her face thin and cat like from years of battles, sharp claws pointed like daggers and she holds her keys like daggers in between her fingers. Her hair cascades down her back and along her small shoulders, bringing her face light with its goldenness. Her arms thin and hands soft but capable of doing great things when set to it. Collar bones deep enough to drowned in and chest not needing anything more or anything less, legs taut enough to enclose someone in a straight jacket. 
    Smile so quick and so sculpted like a goddess from the textbook you sifted though in the local library. Her sharp wit becoming and sarcasm evocative like you need to hear more of it. Graceful but boisterous, tiny body seeming like a fortress of ignited fury that could destroy you with words which have always been more powerful than fists. 
    Light bounces off of her like it was made to, haloing her head so perfectly you think that angels might start singing. Beauty startling, deep eyes that don’t look away unless you do first, forests grow inside her, spreading out to make her wise and noble. Reality of words come out of her soft lips, or at least you think they are, sometimes you wish you could spend the night testing out the theory but then you sight her unblinking eyes and quick hands moving furtively, steady feet walk across floors, stiff shoulders and down cast glances that make you bow down again. 
    And you want to kiss her, you want to feel her lips pressed against your own and you’re not sure why. You’ve never felt attraction to anyone, never felt the need for touching or feeling and it scared the living shit out of you. What if you hurt her? What if you see a a familiar fear in her eyes but then again you can barely imagine that look in her fearless green stares. You want to bury you face in that mane of hair and you want to listen to her talk with that long, snarky voice that is drawn out and thoughtful, soft and whispering like every word is something you are blessed with. Because you are.
    Sometimes you wonder what even lying with her would be like, legs tangled and bodies heated by the waves coming off the other’s. You think about who else has touched her and felt her and had her and you grow jealous over something that you have no right to feel jealous over. But you can’t imagine her letting anyone even get close to her, she’s thunderous and could destroy your house with a word. Her hands are merely machines, her words weapons of war, able to get you to crumble and bend under her will like a siren. 
    She’s fiery, she’s gentle and she’s crazy and you’re not sure who she is but you know that she is someone and you know a thousand people could never fill her shoes. And you are guilty because you want to see her when the sharp blades of her heels aren’t hitting the floor with deafening screams of ‘Don't touch me, I am not yours.’  you want to see her wake up, when the morning makes her calm and vulnerable and you want to see her cheek smushed against a pillow and you want to see her chest rise and fall and then you want to see her make coffee and drink it with bags under her eyes while leaning against the counter. And you want to see her smile and you want to see her cry and you want to see her laugh and scream and you want her to be yours, and you want her to be yours. 
    But she will never be yours.
    Because she is her own, first and always.
    It reminds you of when you were in second grade and your mother told you ‘no means no’ and how you listened and believed her but a part of you always thought about loop holes. But there are no loop holes because when you look at her you are terrified because she is strong and you are weak and she will break you and you will let her. 
    And when you’re sleeping you can’t stop picturing her laying across from you and you want her but you want a lot of things so you get up and you walk over in pitch black to your cold seat in the corner of your quiet room. You pick up a pen and you flip open a note book labeled a scribbled word. The light switch of your desk lamp in switched on you and scratch the back of your neck before putting your pen down.
    And you write. 


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    DRAAAAFT

    Post  Admin on Sun Jun 01, 2014 12:07 am

    Sereh lifted the box into the back of the tram. My brother followed her, holding a larger, much heavier load and set it down.
    “I think we’re good.” Abhay smiled at me, his bright white teeth might be blinding if I hadn’t grown up around it. Sereh rolled her eyes and pushed past him to my parents, who waited near the bench. 
    “I think so too.” My mother waved me over and I jumped off the tram, my brother right behind. 
    “Packed?” She said. My mother’s thick accent always slurred her P’s. 
    “I’m good. I’ve cleared out everything.” 
    Sereh tapped me on the shoulder and I turned to her. “I wanted to give you this.” She spoke gently, as she always did. Sereh had a way of calming everyone down, especially my brother. 
    “You didn’t have to.”
    “I did.” She grinned, her face was the perfect shape for smiling. She had a wide nose and high arched eyebrows, dark freckles peppered the bridge across her nose and along her cheeks. Her dark skin was smooth and her curly unmanageable hair tied back tightly. She handed me a small notebook. “When Ab went away I gave him the same thing, he said it helped.” She glanced shyly at my brother, who stood with my father, “I hope you can use it too.” 
    “Thank you, Sereh.” 
    “I just hope you’ll write all about your adventures.”
    “I will. Keep Ab in line okay?”
    “Always do.”
    “I know.”
    My mother flew in between us, her head scarf hitting my face as she stormed by. “Let’s go! You’ll be late!” She pulled me by my wrist, climbing the stairs of the tram and shoved my ticket against my chest.
    “Mother-”
    “Aditi.” She said and grabbed my face, holding it in between her wrinkled, dark hands. “My beautiful sky. Beautiful, steady sky.”
    I couldn’t help but roll my eyes. “Mother.” 
    “You be good? You keep grades up? ṭhīk hai!” Okay! My mother loves to just yell questions at me. 
    jī hā. Mother, yes, I know.” 
    “Don’t talk back to me.” She grumbled and pulled me close, hugging me against her. We are practically the same height. She kissed my neck and I rested my head against her shoulder.”
    “I’ll miss you, mother, I’ll comm every week.”
    “Every day.”
    “Every week.”
    “Every other day.”
    “Fine.”
    Mujhe tumse dil se pyar hai”  I love you with all my heart.
    “I love you too mother.”
    I saw my father from the corner of my eye and turned to him as he engulfed me in warmth. So much hugging.
    “Study hard.”
    “I know, make the family proud.”
    “We are already proud.”
    I smiled and kissed my father on the cheek. “I love you.”
    “I love you too, steady sky.”
    Abhay kissed the top of my head. “You show them who’s the smartest?”
    “I’ll show them.”

    Amala boarded the tram, her perfectly straight black hair flowing from behind her, her white lab coat was messy. She wore no make up, her thick eyebrows raised when she saw me and smiled. My family is good at smiling. 
    “Remember what I taught you.” She almost sang, her voice was always so melodic. 
    I don’t remember once being jealous of Amala, I could have been, easily, but she was just so nice and pure that there was no way. Her name even meant pure. 
    In India, I can still recall her making sure I got to school on time and did all my lessons and when we moved she homeschooled me till she herself went off to a school.
    “I’ll never forget it.” 
    Amala hugged me and kissed my temple, sliding back to let the twins barrel into my stomach. 
    Abha and Agni. The light of our household. 
    “Aditi, Aditi!” They both chimed, asking me a billion questions a minute. I kneeled down and hugged them. “I’ll be back at the end of the semester and maybe I’ll even bring you guys a present.”
    “Presents!” they ran circles around my mother who sighed. “Don’t encourage them.”
    More people boarded the tram, a middle aged woman with black hair in a messy bun, strands of gray starting near her ears, walked on, looking tearful and lost. A tall, tan, freckled boy walked on behind her. There was a backpack slung over his shoulder. He had a pointed nose and a large, expressive forehead, thick eyebrows. His black hair was shaved along the sides, a flop of messy hair hung down into his eyes in the middle. 
    “Ti!” I yelled to him and waved. The boy looked up and grinned at me, his mother tentatively smiled too and walked over, my mother walking toward her and taking her arm. 
    “Addy!” The boy bounded toward me and wrapped his arms around me, swinging me around with his muscular arms. 
    I shoved him off and got my feet back on the ground. “Ready?”
    “No. But yes. I’m ready.”
    “I’m ready.”
    ‘You’re ready for everything, you’re miss prepared.”
    I smirked and started toward Tirie’s mother, Elisa. “El, do you need help getting bags on the tram?”
    She shook her head and patted my arm. “No sweety, we already got them on, thank you.” she looked me over. “You look so grown up and I just saw you yesterday.” 
    I wanted to hug her but Ti was already kissing his mothers head, he had at least a foot on her. “Mom, I’ll call on the way there, promise.”
    “You better or else I’ll ride all the way out just to ground you.” 
    Elisa is protective of her son. All mothers are, but she was a single mother, an artist, she had nothing. Ti was her only light. He was her son. Her sun. 
    “Where’s Mingo?” My mother asked.
    It was if Mingo was waiting to be asked for because he stepped on right about then. He saw us immediately and waved. Mingo’s dyed blonde hair stood out against his skin and dark, narrow eyes. Even though Mingo smiled he had a downcast look on his face but perked up when he saw Ti.
    “Hello.” His voice was silvery and he set down his bag on a seat. 
    My family and Elisa greeted him and then Ti and Mingo hugged quickly, like they didn’t want anyone to see them hug. They broke apart and shared a look before Ti laughed and looked away.
    “Move.” I barked and pushed Ti out of the way so I could see Mingo, he stood a little taller then me with a compressed jaw and a wide mouth. He blinked and hugged me, I squeezed him back and punched him on the arm. “You where almost late.”
    “Sorry.” He laughed. His blonde hair swept across his eyes. Everyone knew it was dyed, Mingo is Asian, but he pulled it off well. Ming always looks good no matter what.
    Another voice came over the comm and we started saying our good byes, it wasn’t as big as a deal as my family made it out to be. I said goodbye to them and waved to Sereh from the window, she was talking to one of the men at the gate, asking him about the tram I guess. 
    Ti looked like he might cry as he watched his mother wave from the outside. He isn’t separated from her that much. 
    The tram started to pull away. Me and Ti kept waving. I didn’t know how to feel. Hopeful. Sad. Unbearably anxious. 
    I sat back in my seat when I couldn’t see my family anymore and watched Mingo and Tirie talk back and forth. 


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    Re: Anything Writing, Critic

    Post  Admin on Fri Jun 13, 2014 2:41 am

    Soon would be meal time, she needed to bring back something for sister. The air was humid and the buzzing of the green-ones was the only noise. Every little step that she took was careful, planned out. Down by the riverbank stood a four legged beast with an elongated neck, dark snout, and barrel stomach. It chomped on the weeds growing in the shallow water while it’s tail swished back and forth. It made a neighing sound and threw its head in the air, trying to clear away the bugs that crawled into its skin.
    She pressed her palm to the soil to feel the vibration of the rest of the beast’s herd. More of the creatures approached, alerting their presence by bucking into the air and slamming down with their hoofs. They crowded around the water and paced around each other. The graceful beasts seemed antsy about something. 
    There was a rustle from the billowing tall grass but the beats made no moves. The hunter adjusted her grip on the spear she held. -Siephe. She said lowly to herself while eyeing the antlers that the large bull of the herd had. -To many. She slunk back to the hill overlooking the riverbank, using the grass as a cover. She sat on top of the hill and put her spear down next to her and propped herself up to sit on her knees. Her round eyes squinted as she tried to see better from her view. The herd down below started to calm down; calves butted into their mothers for milk and males only grunted at each other when one came to close. 
    The hunter untied the speckled pelt that hung around her waist and threw it to the ground. She held her spear in her lap and took out a flint from the pack she had been carrying. The flint was brought down on the spear’s head and the noise reminded the hunter of ikaz claws scraping stone. Her eyes kept darting back to the herd below her, she couldn’t find a single weakened siephe. -Earth mother, please send me a sickly old mare for my tribe. Earth mother, I will sacrifice my share for you and rekindle the fire of your sons and daughters. Please help my tribe mother, you know I would never call on you for anything foolish. This is serious. I need to bring back something for them. They will laugh at me again. Please earth mother. 
    The hunter scooped up soil in her palm and blew it into the breeze as a sign of good fortune to the mother. -Thank you. 
    Sisters always said she was blessed by the mother, that the goddess gave her such bright hair for a reason. The sisters said that blue was the color of water, which is life, and purple is the color of royalty, so mixed together must mean that she was special. The hunter never felt special. 
    A low cry of pain brought her out of her prayerful thoughts. She looked up, a limping siephe walked through the heard. It was a female, her legs wobbled from underneath her large girth and she whimpered in pain at every step.
    The hunter let out a yelp of joy and blew a kiss up to the sky. -Thank you mother!
    She crouched down again, lowering her body into the dirt and slid through the grass like a predator. Her spear was held close to her, she was only a few yards away from where the grass stopped. She pulled back her hair and tied it tight with a small band so that it was less noticeable. The weak mare was shoved away from the riverbank, healthy siephes where greedy. She whinnied and stamped her foot in frustration. A young buck slammed into her and the old siephe crumpled under her own weight. The hunter winced -Don’t worry, I will help you soon. 
    The mare made an agonizing groan and slumped backward, her head hit the ground and dust flowed up from beneath her. 
    -Poor thing. The hunter felt a guilt in her chest. It hurt her to see such a docile creature in so much pain and it hurt her to see the younger siephe’s treating an elder that way. 
    The hunter jumped out of her camouflage and waves her arms around while shouting. Siephe scattered, they wouldn’t take the chance of changeling a 7 foot hunter with a spear. They all where gone, all except the old mare. The mare whinnied and tried to lift itself to its feet but only fell back down again. -Calm down. Don’t worry. The hunter approached and the siephe tried to get away from her but she kneeled down next to its head while shushing it’s cries. She stroked it’s tangled mane and slid out her knife. 
    -Thank you. Thank you for your bones and fur and hide. Thank you for your life. You shall be returned to the earth with mother, you will be reborn again. 
    She slid the knife across the siephe’s throat ever so gently. The old mare was silenced. 
    -Oh, all mother. I thank you for this blessing you have gifted upon me and I am humbled by your mercy. I shall give the heart up to you oh, all mother. Go in peace now wise old siephe, go in peace to the grazing fields of the mother. Go in peace and return to were you where born. Return to the earth mother. 


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